Words of the Day update

In an effort to increase perspicaciousness and obfuscation, I have updated my Summer '06 Words of the Day post to include definitions for each.

Go read them, or I'll call you a termagant.

On Buckets

I was talking to Krebscout the other night about relationships. I told her that I really want someone. Krebscout responded that she didn’t really understand that line of thinking:

“[I just don’t understand the idea of wanting] someone, as opposed to wanting a specific someone. To me, that means wanting someone for the wrong reasons. Wanting someone to fill a void or for action or something. I don't like the idea of seeking a boyfriend. I like the idea of going through life making friends until I fall in love with one of them, and then seeking that person, because of the qualities they have.”

I agreed, but I’m not just looking for “action.” It’s something apart from that. I want someone I can love. I want someone I can be with, someone to walk along the path of life with me. I want to be able to give the best of myself wholeheartedly and know that she’ll be happier for it.

It’s like I’ve been carrying around a heavy bucket of love for a year and a half. It’s filled with something wonderful, but I need to share it. Carrying it alone, it’s too much. It weighs on me. I feel it. I need relief. Man and woman are meant to be together, and I’m alone.

I’m trying, though. I’m trying to find my someone. In the past three months, I’ve tried to share that bucket with two different girls. One of them discovered that she’s holding on to another bucket much more tightly than she’d thought, and one of them is wary of bucket-sharing after being hurt by another shared bucket not too long ago. I’ve considered others: one girl has sworn off buckets for the present time, another would have to have very long arms to be able to share my bucket when she goes to Europe this summer, even if she were willing. If I’ve already found my someone, she’s doing a pretty good job of hiding the fact.

I’m not asking for a pity party here. Anyone who knows me in person knows that I’m a happy person. I shocked Lavish to the core the other day when I intimated that I wasn’t having the greatest of days. That’s a rare occurrence. Generally, I’m bounce-off-the-walls happy and optimistic beyond all reason. I’m happy with the way my life’s going. (How could I not be? I write for the Board, I have billions-plus-or-minus-a-few friends, I just got a new job, I’ll see my brother for the first time in four years two months from now, I may win a trip to Korea this summer, and spring is here with its attendant Frisbees and barbecues.)

I just want to share my bucket.

Materialism at its finest

So it's my birthday. Today. While I don't really expect anything for my birthday, I've been thinking that if I were to make a list of things I wanted for my birthday, you could all get a feel for how nerdy I truly am. So, without further ado, I present my birthday list, in order of approximately decreasing likelihood that anyone will actually give it to me.

Coldplay's A Rush of Blood to the Head (Optimistic. won't be giving me this one.) Coldplay's Parachutes (Optimistic. objects only slightly less to this one.)

This really nerdy shirt from xkcd.com

Any of the following Rubik's Cubes: (They're available at the Bookstore)

This LED binary clock from ThinkGeek.

Any of the Star Wars prequel movies on DVD, just to round out my collection. (Widescreen, please.) Any of the Lord of the Rings movies on DVD. (Extended edition and widescreen, please.)

A couple Gamecube controllers for my newly acquired Gamecube.

A television for use with the Gamecube.

An iPod of any variety. I kinda like the green ones, if you're buying.

A tuning for the upright piano in my apartment.

A voucher for a new MacBook once OS X Leopard comes out.

Yep, I think that ought to do. That should fill my materialistic quota for the next century.
Of course, if you're actually considering buying me any of these things, I'm perfectly willing to extend the deadline well beyond the 8th. Just so you know.